'nuthin is worse then chemotherapy

So I came back home to Massachusetts on Friday afternoon. So great to be back home albeit my parent's house. But, I love my parents. I am truly lucky that my parents are also my friends. My parents are just so cool. Through this whole journey they have totally been supportive. Without them and my friends I don't know how I would have gotten through this.

The same holds true when I was 9 and did my stint with chemo & radiation. Gawd, chemo fucking sucks. Gastric Bypass is a breeze compared to chemo. Who wants toxins pumped into their body? I was walking skeleton. But, I must say I was truly beautiful bald. Thank god I didn't have cancer. I had/ have a rare benign tumor (Aggressive Fibromatosis). So rare there is no cure, just amputation of the limb. Radiation stopped it from growing and I still have my arm!! I was lucky!

Everyone said I was brave. I wasn't brave. I just wanted to get through it and past it. I am a big believer in facing challenges and working through them. In fact I love a good challenge. Believe me, I have had my fair share! My motto is suck it up and deal. Sometimes you just have to.

Well, now people are telling me that I am brave because I had Gastric Bypass. Doing what needs to be done, doesn't make me brave. Atleast not in my opinion. I needed help. I needed to do something. And I did.

'nuthin is worse then chemotherapy!!!!

Back & 12 lbs. Lighter

Howdie y'all. I am back!! The last 2 weeks have been insanely bizarre! But, nonetheless amazing!! As, you all know I had my surgery on 1.3.05. I am almost 2 weeks post-op, yipppeeeee!!!! Sorry, I haven't posted in awhile. But, I was staying with my parents @ a family friends house in New Jersey. I had my surgery done in Manhattan. But, now I am home in Massachusetts!! Oh so exciting!!

The surgery went well, I guess. It was done laproscopically. There was a 10% chance my surgeon was going to have to perform an open. HE DIDN'T. It took 5.5 hours because of the size of my liver. I didn't loose all the weight my surgeon wanted me to. He took his time and was very slow and cautious. But, he told my parents and I the surgery would be about 4 hours. No one came out to tell my parents that it would be longer. Needless, to say my parents thought I had died or I was being sliced like a fish!

I spent 4 hours in recovery. My back hurt so bad I thought I was going to be paralyzed. And, I was so nauseas. I have had numerous operations and never had a reaction like this. I was transferred to my room at about 10:15pm. At which point I told my nurse I wanted to get up and go for a walk. She looked at me funny & told me that I didn't have to get up that night. I told that I wanted to get up and walk. And, I did. It felt wonderful.

I was discharged Thursday 1.5.06 and went down to South Jersey to recuperate. Monday 1.9.06, I had my one week follow-up appointment. All went well. I was down 12 lbs. I was slightly dehydrated and couldn't start pureed foods until I could get all my fluids in. This has been a big challenge. I haven't been in my own house. Was unable to create my own schedule. So I have been pushing protein shakes & fluids. By Sunday I will fully be doing pureed foods.

Starting weight - 392 lbs
Weight @ surgery - 380 lbs
1.9.06 - 368 lbs

P.S. As of 5pm Friday 1.13.05, I am back home. Love being back in my parent's house!!!!

3-2-1 HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

It's gonna be a happy New Year. It is the year of Marla. I can not wait till Tuesday!!! Well, let me share with you how I spent my New Year's Eve.

I was alone in my place in Manhattan, CLEANING!!! I was supposes to go to a friend's party out on Long Island but I canceled that. Too much to do before surgery on Tuesday!! I dumped 14 bag of trash!! I now have a floor again. It is very exciting!!!

I watched the ball drop on TV. I couldn't watch Dick Clark. I feel so bad for him having that stroke. His speech isn't 100% yet, and watching him just made me sad. So I watched my favorite TV guy, REGIS PHILBIN!!! It was a very exciting 1.5 hours with Regis!!

I had an epiphany at about 11:45 pm last night. I was in Manhattan, 10 blocks away from where the ball drops in Times Square & I was watching this on TV. It made me chuckle and smile. The bonus was I had access to a bathroom. And was warm.

The rules for New Year's Eve in Times Square:

Once you go through security you can not leave your section for any reason and come back!! You are stuck.

No alcohol

People started going through security at 1:30 in the afternoon. There are no port -a-potties. The is way to long for me to be without and be standing in out spot freezing cold. Hence, I watched it on TV.

My next post will include my resolutions for the New Year! To tired to do it now. I hope everyone has a fantabulous & healthy 2006.

Getting Sliced on Tuesday January 3, 2006

All is a go!!! I didn't speak to my surgeon today as planned (he had an emergency surgery to perform). However, I spoke to the receptionist, who told me that he told her all is a go!!

Yipppeeee. I am so excited.

Surgery is scheduled for 11:30 am. Can't wait!!

I am SOON TO BE A FORMER FAT GIRL!!!

Random Marla Factoids

The Wizard of Oz is my all time favorite movie

Dusty Springfield's Son of a Preacher Man is my favorite song

I like reality tv - I love the Real World & American Idol

I watch or have watched: American Idol, The Simple Life, The OC, Laguna Beach, Made, Daisy Does America, as well as others.

I truly love watching the 24 hour marathon of A Christmas Story on Christmas Eve

I have been known to put ketchup on everything. It makes a great dip

I love Saturday Night Live - Molly Shannon was one of my fave cast members

I have seen the movie Back to the Beach 54 times

I saw Wayne's World 7 times when it came out in theaters

I had a crush on Ferris Bueller

I hate panty hose

I hate having my period

I failed my driver's license test the first time

At 25, I still don't like being in the basement of my parent's house at night by myself

I still sleep with my cabbage patch kid Anton

Every surgery I have had since I got Anton (I was four), he has been in the OR with me. When I have my Gastric Bypass he will come with me too.

I think Sean Connery is HOT

If I were married I would have an affair with Pierce Brosnan

Robert Redford is beautiful & Paul Newman has amazing eyes. We need to give Paul Newman's eyes to Robert Redford. That would be a beautiful man.

I actually like matzah

I hate gefilte fish & lox (smoked salmon)

I am still a virgin

I sleep naked

I had my first kiss @ 15 while at summer camp. The boy's name was Andy Becknal, and he was from Kentucky. He was adorable. We both had Doc Martens.

At one time my family had 9 guinea pigs. Lots of babies.

When I get a dog, I will name him Nigel

I admire my brother Ethan

I am envious of the fact that my brother is 6'4" and weighs 160 lbs.

I wear fur and love it. - Animals aren't just for food

I will buy a pair of Jimmy Choo's and Manolo's one day

I do not pick my nose

I love to drive

My favorite drink is Diet Coke with Malibu Rum and a lime - but I have given up diet soda and alcohol prior to Gastric Bypass

I have gone through Chemotherapy & Radiation

I had a wig but never wore it. I viewed wearing it as making people aroun d me comfortable and @ 10 years old going through chemo I didn't want to do that.

My arm was supposed to be amputated when I was 9.

I weigh 380 lbs & I am SOON TO BE A FORMER FAT GIRL

Things that make you go hmmm.

So my surgery is scheduled for Tuesday (5 days away). I am down 12 lbs. My surgeon wanted me to loose 20-25lbs. Since he has office hours tomorrow, that means I get to call him bright and early in the morning. They way I see it is this I can definitely loose 3 pounds by Tuesday. However if I am doing clear liquids for 48 hours prior to surgery and a bowel prep wouldn't that give me another 2 lbs at least??

Which would be about a 5 lbs and a net loss of 17 lbs. Hopefully, I am correct in my thinking! If not, my surgery will be in 2-3 weeks which isn't so bad. I am so close. I know that either way it will definitely be happening this month. I am SO excited. I truly can not wait to start my new life.

New motto that is getting me through:

If it was easy for me to loose weight, I wouldn't have considered having Gastric Bypass.

And my personal motto:

I am the strongest person I know!

Santa didn't bring this Jew Girl toys!

Hi my name is Marla. I am Jewish & NO I DO NOT GET A PRESENT FOR EACH OF THE 8 NIGHTS OF CHANUKAH!!! I truly enjoy Chanukah. Allow me to elaborate on some things:

- I do not have Christmas tree, have never had one, and will never have one.

- I don't have a Chanukah bush either. Will never have one.

- I did have my photo taken while on Santa's lap. I was about six. I was in Boston with my dad. I had to go to the hospital to have a bone scan of my arm. They inject with you with dye so that your insides show up in different colors on a monitor. Unfortunately, you need to wait about an hour or 2 from injection till scan so the dye can travel through your veins. Well, I had/ have really bad veins. Long story short, I was held down by 2 nurses so that they could use a vein at the bottom of my foot. Horrible pain. They aren't allowed to use the bottom of feet anymore. Well after my dad and I had time to kill so we went to Filene's in Downtown Crossing. I think my dad felt really bad that I was in so much pain and traumatized, that he let me have my picture taken with Santa. Was fun though!!

- While growing up, my family did Chanukah gift giving in one night. My father owned (has since retired) a retail bike store. As, he couldn't be home each night of Chanukah we did gifts all in one night. No, we did not each get 8 gifts. Birthdays are a bigger deal in my family.

- I have a Menorah. I truly enjoy lighting the candles. NO, my parents do not let my brother and I make a wish & blow out the candles.

- Chanukah Harry does not exist. He does not bring good Jewish boys and girls presents. YOUR PARENTS GIVE YOU PRESENTS FOR CHANUKAH! He exists only in a Saturday Night Live skit. Which was hilarious by the way! And no, contrary to popular belief Chanukah Harry is not dating the Easter Bunny or the Tooth Fairy!!

Chanukah was good to me this year.

List of Presents:

Parents- A really cool hair thing with rhinestones and a great black beaded bracelet.

Ethan (brother) - Urban Outfitters Room Spray (Honeysuckleish) and a rose bath bomb, complete with petals.

Molly - World Poker Tour Plug & Play Texas Hold'em, a journal, and a coloring book (of the movie Madagascar) & crayons to bring with me to the hospital.

Sarah - Black clutch purse (shockingly I didn't have one) & Shalom gum!!

Ali - heroes of the Torah (the set of 4) drinking glasses!

Kelly - Monkey alarm clock (yes it makes monkey noises), a handmade necklace, a handmade purse, a t-shirt, and lotion from her parents. It smells like buttercream frosting. So good.

Nan- A truly awesome bracelet!

And I still have to exchange gifts with some NY friends as I was in Boston for the Holidays. Fun Fun!! I have done very well so far though!!